Somewhere in Sector 23 of the Gamma Quadrant...
"My most sincere apologies for interrupting, Commander, but you must see the latest of the new historical documents!"
Mathesar looked up from Lahnk's latest requisition list to see Teb's tentacles waving frantically. "What is it?"
"Commander Taggart is in desperate trouble and needs our help!" Teb pressed a button; the wallscreen lit up and displayed the command deck of the N.S.E.A. Protector.
"Alien vessel on hailing frequency zeta," intoned the ship's computer.
"We're being hailed by the alien vessel on zeta frequency!" Lt. Madison cried.
"On screen," Dr. Lazarus replied, his words clipped and tone sharp as the command crew of the Protector faced the viewscreen with trepidation.
Barely suppressed gasps of shock and dismay met the terrifying sight. Commander Taggart's face was half-covered by a gelatinous alien, and the being had wrapped its tail around Taggart's neck several times. He stood stiffly and his glazed eyes focused on Dr. Lazarus as he began to speak in a monotone that bore no resemblance to Taggart's normal bravado.
"I am Barada of Nikto. Your life as you know it is over. Join us and live in peace or pursue your present course and face obliteration. The decision rests with you."
Dr. Lazarus stood up and calmly faced the alien. Only those who knew him very well, like the crew he'd served with for nearly twenty years, could tell that he was worried for his friend. "Release Commander Taggart immediately, or you will face the combined forces of the National Space Exploration Administration!"
The alien continued as if Dr. Lazarus hadn't interrupted. "Be aware that if you choose to fight, we will prevail. The knowledge and experience of the human Taggart is part of us now, and has prepared us for all possible attempts to defeat us."
"By Grabthar's hammer, by the sons of Warvan, we will resist you!"
Taggart's mouth twisted in a sad parody of his regular smile. "Your resistance is hopeless, 'old friend.' You will be absorbed!"
Meanwhile, back on Earth...
Groans filled the convention hall as the music swelled and the twenty-foot tall movie screen faded momentarily to black, followed by "To Be Continued."
"Oh, come on, guys, like you didn't know that was coming? Besides, you don't think we'd leave you hanging there forever, do you?" Jason's voice held a teasing tone as it echoed through the massive sound system.
A voice from the back of the room yelled "Did you think we'd forget episodes one-oh-two and one-oh-three?" and the crowd laughed.
"That wasn't my fault! It was all Alexander's idea." Jason clapped a hand on Alexander's shoulder and grinned as Alexander glared at him.
"Only because you didn't hear the sarcasm in my voice when I said 'wouldn't it be fun if Taggart and Lazarus got stuck on an uninhabited planet for a month while the rest of the crew tries to rescue us,'" Alexander replied dryly.
"Gwen told me later that the rest of the crew had a lot of fun while filming those episodes," Jason said, turning to grin at her as she joined him and Alexander on the apron of the stage.
"Of course they did, they got two entire weeks at work without you around on the main sound stage," Alexander said wryly.
"What I didn't tell you was that Alex got hazard pay for those episodes," Gwen said, making no attempt at all to try to hide her smile.
The crowd laughed again as Jason made an exaggerated face then turned back to face the front of the stage. Gwen gave Alexander a high five behind Jason's head, much to the delight of the fans.
The emcee broke in as the crowd's laughter faded. "All right, folks, our time is up for today. The cast will be signing autographs and posing for pictures at the tables at the head of the dealers' room. Tomorrow we'll show our exclusive sneak preview of the season six premiere episode 'The Gort Dilemma Part Two,' so be sure you keep your ticket from today's showing of the cliffhanging season five finale so we know to let you back in!"
The autograph lines wound around the room, moving slowly as the cast members signed photos and posed for photos. Each actor had their own table, except Fred and Laliari, who sat next to each other, hands remaining firmly clasped as they signed autographs.
It was similar to the cons the original cast had attended every year for the last nineteen (though with less pandering to Jason's ego), until all of a sudden a loud beeping emitted simultaneously from the voxes they'd retained after their adventures on the Protector II.
"Okay, folks, we need to take a break!" Jason waved his hands, motioning for the groans of dismay from the crowd to quiet down as he continued. "Don't worry, you won't even notice that we're gone."
He jerked his head in the direction of the room set aside as their green room during the con, and the everyone moved swiftly in that direction. Alexander and Gwen exchanged worried glances as Guy muttered under his breath. Tommy rolled his eyes at Guy's mumblings.
"Shut up, Guy, we're not going to die," Jason said as he motioned for Fred to shut the door.
"How do you know?" Guy's voice was getting shrill already. "The last time we were in a situation that required us to use these we nearly died!"
"He does have a point, Jason," Gwen said with a worried look at the communicator in her hand.
"Oh please, we're not in a spaceship that's about to crash, so we're already ahead of the curve this time," Alexander replied in a snappish tone.
Jason gave them all an annoyed look before flipping open his vox. "This is the commander, what's the emergency?"
The confusion in Mathesar's voice came through clearly. "Commander Taggart! Are you all right?"
"Of course, Mathesar, why wouldn't I be?"
"We received transmission of the new historical documents and were shocked to see that you had been captured by the evil Nikto! In all our dealings with them, we have never managed to escape unscathed or without cost, and were worried that you would be killed!"
The room went completely silent, then as one Jason, Alexander, Gwen, Tommy, and Guy turned to look at Laliari with nearly identical expressions of shock on their faces as she grinned back. Fred continued eating a Snickers, giving a nonchalant shrug at Gwen's questioning look and head motion towards Laliari.
Jason raised the vox up again so he could speak into it. "Uh, no, we survived them just fine," he said faintly.
"Thank Ipthar!" Teb cried.
"Indeed," muttered Alexander, grimacing at Gwen's elbow in the side.
"Where are you guys, Teb?" Tommy asked.
"We are approaching the edge of your solar system, and are approximately 5.62 parsecs away from Earth."
"Great! Why don't you guys park the ship and hop a pod down to my place and we'll all have dinner together. Some friends of ours—the kids who helped us defeat Sarris and return home safely—would love to meet you and take a tour of the ship," Jason said jovially.
"Splendid! We look forward to meeting more of your crew mates," Mathesar replied.
"See you when you get here! Over and out." Jason flipped the vox shut with a snap, and turned to Laliari with a grin. "Next time warn us if we're going to be using real aliens in a storyline on the show, all right?"
Laliari bobbed her head and smiled in acknowledgment. "Certainly, Commander."
If you recognize a line, it's probably one of many shamelessly stolen lovingly appropriated from their original movie or show in fond homage. *vbg* Gracias to my dear friend Tiriel, who gave me the idea in the first place. :)
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